


How Flowers in Futility Bloom

by Sensha_do



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: F/F, Yuri, pre-canon timeline
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-04-24
Packaged: 2018-10-11 17:02:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10469883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sensha_do/pseuds/Sensha_do
Summary: Sayaka and Kyouko find themselves at a standstill, unable to move forward and unable to go backwards. How do they accept one another when, all around them, danger lurks? Pre-final timeline/Pre-Rebellion.





	1. Chapter 1 (Sayaka)

**Author's Note:**

> An aspect of PMMM which always interested me is the multitudes of timelines that Homura left behind. According Gen Urobuchi, there are nearly 100 of these futile timeloops.
> 
> This story takes place in one of them.

She found Kyouko once again lounging on her bed, apple in hand, surrounded by crinkling bags filled with the dust and debris of near-total devouring. As usual the redhead smirked challengingly, with a comment already fighting to escape her teeth. Sayaka only shot her a look while placing her schoolbag on the desk. It was late evening, and she had arrived home from school with the sun setting behind her.

"No comment yet?"

Sayaka continued to ignore the girl; her homework was laid out before her in record time. It was just as she was about to place headphones over her ears that she felt Kyouko's strong hands grip her own, stopping the action.

"Oi, what's the deal Sayaka? You're being a bad host."

"Or maybe _you're_ being a bad guest. An uninvited one, at that."

Kyouko grunted, dropping her hands uselessly to the side. She wore her favorite teal hoodie and shorts, and in the no-man's land between the top and the bottom her exposed, flat stomach was visible. Sayaka tried hard not to look; thankfully, her anger overtook her desire.

"Uninvited? Don't be like that."

Sayaka turned in her seat to glare at the girl. "I felt bad for you once. _Once._ And you haven't stopped taking advantage of me since."

"I never asked you to pity me, Miki. I don't want _anyone_ to pity me."

"Let me just get to the point then - why are you here today?"

"Why? Thought we could hunt some witches today or somethin'. Seems there's a big one by the hospital - "

"The hospital is Mami's territory, Kyouko. We all had an agreement."

"Oh, she won't mind missing just one grief seed will she? That girl's pretty efficient with her magic anyway." And in a slight whisper she added, "Despite all those guns she wastes..."

"It's the principle of things."

"Tch."

Sayaka ended the conversation by turning back to her work. She couldn't handle Kyouko sometimes - ever since the redhead showed up in Mitakihara, her life had been thrown into even more disarray than what was normal to be expected when one was a magical girl.

The redhead skulked back to Sayaka's bed - it seemed that, despite being angry, she still wasn't going to leave. That was fine. Sayaka would get to her when she was good and ready.

An hour or so passed in charged silence. For some time the only sound in the room was the scratching of Sayaka's pencil on paper which carried through the room's warm air. Kyouko looked around and snacked a bit, but for once the girl wasn't allowing her emotions to be worn on her sleeves. This distracted Sayaka; for the first time in her life she actually _wanted_ Kyouko to open that big mouth of hers.

In her distracted state Sayaka could not help but remember that time, not so long before, when she had shown the other girl a sentimental sympathy she falsely projected as mere pity.

~!~

It was a nightmarish event that first brought the girls together. They had all felt it, the five magical girls situated in Mitakihara. Like a slime, a crawling cold goo slithering up their spines, each girl sensed the emergence - the hellish birth - of an unexpectedly large witch in the center of the city.

Mami sent out a call to each of the girls. She was the experienced older sister-type and cared deeply for even the most distant of her younger cohorts, or so she had told Sayaka one afternoon.

"For the safety of the people, we should all work together for this one." Mami said over the phone.

Sayaka raised an eyebrow in surprise when she saw Kyouko waiting, foot tapping in frustration, besides Homura, Madoka, and Mami. The witch was making its home in an old building. It stood decrepit and crumbling, but was still in a populated area of the city (and thus, a danger for passing potential victims).

"So what's the deal?" the greedy girl asked. "Final hit gets the grief seed?"

"Is that all you care about?" Sayaka shot back.

"My bad for wanting the thing that keeps me alive, little miss knight."

"No need to fight." Madoka stepped between them, smiling nervously. "We're all here as friends."

Homura simply stood back, her eyes never leaving Madoka. Her expression was as unreadable as always.

"Yes, Kyouko. Whichever of us kills the witch gets the grief seed - but of course, it'd only be right for the winner to gift it to whoever might need it the most if this battle truly takes its toll." Mami cautioned, her smile bright and supportive.

"Better hope one of you wins it before I do." Kyouko smirked.

While the witch's labyrinth itself was shorter and less dangerous than usual, the battle was more difficult than any of the girls could have imagined. Not one of them could get in a decisive hit, but the witch certainly could. The witch resembled a Queen chess piece holding a sword and shield, without a visible face. Sayaka, even with her accelerated healing ability, felt the stabbing pain of at least a few broken ribs. Homura and Madoka, both ranged fighters, were barely keeping away from the crawling claws of the screaming witch. Even Mami was bleeding profusely from the side of her face.

And yet, Kyouko kept going at the _thing_. She thrust forward with her spear, but was knocked back again and again and again. Sayaka herself rushed at the witch, swinging and discarding sword after sword - none of which could find purchase in the stone-flesh of the inhuman monster before them.

"Stand back!" Kyouko shouted, and with her spear broken up into chain linked segments she jumped past Sayaka. The spear wrapped around the creature and, using the momentum of her swing, Kyouko changed direction and dove in. The creature was visibly wounded, visibly bleeding technicolor ichor, but still was not dead. With monstrous hands that rose from the ground it gripped the redhead before she could escape and crushed her body like a vice. The witch tossed Kyouko in the air, and she landed with an audible slam. There wasn't sound or movement afterwards.

But now, at least, the battle had been decided. Sayaka launched herself at the witch. The final blow was dealt; it screeched once more before dissolving into nothing. From its position all that remained was the grief seed, which clinked lightly as it fell to the ground. All around them the technicolor labyrinth dissolved as its creator did. Sayaka picked up the grief seed with care. The other girls - sans Kyouko - flocked to her.

"Are you alright?" Mami asked, concern evident in her amber eyes.

"I'm fine, but..." they all turned to Kyouko. It was apparent that she was still alive - her soul gem sat in its place entirely whole, although not without a deadened luster, a cloudy darkness coursing through it. Her soul gem's safety did not attest to her physical condition, unfortunately. Her body was visibly mangled: protrusions of bone poked almost through the skin, and a frightening amount of blood pooled beneath the body. It was a miracle no human passed and witnessed the very real sight of a seemingly dead teenage girl.

"Her soul gem's fine." Homura offered, already walking away from the scene. Madoka reached out towards the girl, but did not follow. The remaining girls were far less certain over the decision to simply leave Kyouko lying there. A few silent minutes passed before Sayaka sighed.

"I'll take her. She _did_ do more than enough of the work to deserve the grief seed anyway."

It was a blessing, the extra strength granted by their magical girl forms. Kyouko barely weighed a thing in Sayaka's arms as she was carried off to the blue haired girl's room. Sayaka took back streets and roof tops. _I must look like a kidnapper or something._

"All this blood is going to stain my cape..." she complained to no one but herself. Kyouko did not stir even once in her arms. For all intents and purposes, the girl might as well have been dead. At that thought Sayaka felt herself shudder, although she did not yet know exactly what Kyouko would mean to her one day soon.

It began to rain before Sayaka reached her home, starting first as a light mist before it down-poured. When she finally entered in through her window she and Kyouko were soaked to the bone. For a brief moment she considered putting the girl on the floor so as to keep her bed free of the disgusting mixture of rain and sticky blood. Ultimately, however, she made the right choice.

"You better appreciate this later." Sayaka whispered to the unconscious body.

Sayaka undressed the girl while averting her eyes as best as she could - she averted her eyes not for Kyouko's benefit, but in order to avoid the horrific sight that was the witch's work. The damage was worse than she expected; not only did she see protrusions of bones beneath Kyouko's skin, but a patchwork of bruises covered her body between crisscrossing slices of flesh. After cleaning the girl up with a towel and wiping away the majority of the wet, sticky blood ( _How was there possibly this much blood in a human?_ she thought, disgusted), Sayaka held the small black grief seed to Kyouko's soul gem. The energy, the magic - whatever these seeds contained quickly eradicated the corruption evidently tainting Kyouko's gem. Sayaka rubbed the girl's head soothingly as the newly pure gem set to work healing her wounds. _She's cute when she's not speaking,_ she admitted to herself.

The danger passed during the night and the lullaby of soothing rain, coupled with Kyouko's satisfied snores, lulled Sayaka to sleep. She passed out beside the girl on her bed, and in the interim between the night and day her own magic set to work healing her body.

When morning arrived with the shining sun, Sayaka found herself awoken by the loud sound of chomping teeth. Beside her in bed Kyouko had a few bags of snacks opened and nearly empty. She grinned sheepishly down at the her blue haired bedmate's groggy eyes.

"Want some?"

Sayaka just closed her eyes again. _What did I get myself into?_

They spent the day together despite their usual animosity. Magical healing certainly had its benefits, but it didn't erase pain so easily; Sayaka felt the phantom of her cracked ribs with each breath, and Kyouko barely moved anything besides her mouth - and the hand bringing food to it. Sayaka attempted to adjust herself a few times, to stop the way her body rested against Kyouko's on that small bed, but eventually gave up. Their bodies pressed together like they were the closest of friends instead of near enemies.

Kyouko passed a bag of chips to Sayaka, who took two.

"Pretty cushy place you've got here." Kyouko noted with a low whistle. She looked around the room, at the very normal-ness of it, of the cute but plain curtains, of the small wooden desk, of the plush carpet. Sayaka didn't know whether to feel proud or not.

"Thanks. I know you...might not be too comfortable with all of this but - "

"If there's anything I've learned living...the way I do, it's that you can find comfort anywhere." A pause. "Thanks, by the way."

"Did I hear that right? _You_ have manners?"

The redhead glared at the other girl, but the blush from her "thank you" still lit up her face. "I was always taught to give thanks where thanks is do, ya know."

"I guess you got the grief seed in the end anyway." Sayaka offered.

"Doesn't feel like a win, this time."

Sayaka turned to Kyouko quickly as the question entered her head. "Would you have done the same for me? Saving me, I mean?"

Kyouko took a few minutes to answer with an apologetic grin, fang as visible as always. "How honest of an answer do you want?"

"I'll take that as a no."

The redhead slipped an arm underneath Sayaka's head. Her arm, despite its strength, was soft and comfortable. _What a comfortable arm. What an infuriating girl!_

"But you're not so bad, even with that annoying sense of 'justice'."

"H-hey! I might've saved you but that doesn't mean I like you."

"I don't like you either." Kyouko responded, pulling Sayaka even closer into her side. "Want some pocky?"

~!~

The blue haired girl sighed - ever since that day, about two weeks before, she couldn't rid herself of Kyouko. Be it at her home, or on the train, or even at the top of the school where Kyouko _didn't_ attend, the redhead managed to make herself comfortable and get in Sayaka's way.

_I almost wish she'd hate me again._

_...Almost_.

Kyouko was selfish, brash, crass, and violent but beneath that hid the heart of a hurt girl searching for attention, for some kind of love in a world where nightly she risked her life - and for what? To live another day as a soulless zombie? Sayaka truly felt sorry for the girl. If only Kyouko could believe in someone or something again! Maybe then she could be changed.

Dusk passed in the selfsame silence that preceded Sayaka's reminiscence. Kyouko hadn't turned the light on near the bed and sat in near darkness. The only light in the room came from a lamp on Sayaka's desk, the contrast of which left Kyouko's side of the room even darker. When she finished her homework Sayaka took a deep breath and called to the infuriating girl on her bed.

"Hey, Kyouko."

Crunch!

"Hey!" Sayaka stood up from her seat, fists balled at her side. "Would you just answer me?"

One more crunch resounded against the walls, and then the soft thud of footsteps on the wooden floor followed. In a mere second Kyouko was standing before Sayaka with the challenging smirk once more on her face and a vibrant energy in her eyes.

"I just want to apologize - " Sayaka began.

"Why? Taking pity on me again?"

"No, you idiot. And it wasn't pity the first time either."

"So what was it? Why save someone so annoying to you?"

"Why do I _need_ a reason? Saving people is what we ought to do, Kyouko. It's our duty as magical girls."

Kyouko shook her head sadly. This was always something that felt strange to Sayaka; despite her brash nature, Kyouko could sometimes seem so much older than she was - more experienced in heartbreak, in loss - than the greedy, impulsive anger might at first attest to. There was history within Kyouko, a history that Sayaka didn't know. It was a lack of knowledge that haunted her the more she wondered about it. The most she knew was that Kyouko seemingly didn't have a home to go back to.

"Haven't you learned yet, Sayaka? That kind of thinking will only get you killed."

Kyouko did end up leaving not long after that. She never mentioned why she'd even shown up in the first place.


	2. Chapter 2 (Kyouko)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kyouko seeks advice.

The church in which she used to live - in which she visited now as to a grave nearly everyday - crumbled with each passing of the sun. The pulpit stood empty and bare, and covered in ash. Dust too settled as a blanket on the pews, but was that not how they started before her wish? It was the walls which showed the true damage, however; they (barely) stood blackened and burnt, jagged like teeth.

In short, it was home.

Kyouko's daily visit tended to come in the morning as a reminder of a time when she and her dear sister sat dutifully for their father's morning sermon. She almost never came after dark. Ghosts, or her past, haunted the bones of the church.

This made it odd, then, that it was the first place she headed after she left Sayaka's apartment.

"She's so naive..." she said to no one in particular. The building was entirely empty, just as it had always been before her wish.

Reflecting on the beginning of the night, Kyouko went over the fact that she didn't end up telling Sayaka why she was really there. _Something_ about the girl tended to get on her nerves and she forgot what she wanted in the first place. It had to be that sense of justice in the other girl - oh, how misplaced!

Sayaka never seemed to leave her mind. The girl wasn't an enigma - no, she was quite the opposite. Kyouko understood just where she was coming from with the selfless cause of her wish (Lucky Kyosuke, whoever he was), and could see where the sense of right and wrong, the justice, the altruistic desire bubbled up from in the girl's heart like an ever-flowing natural spring. And Kyouko understood this so well because her own history attested to the same origin. She too made a selfless wish. She too desired to help and save others. But where did that leave her? In the ruins of her home. It left her among the ashes of her family.

Kyouko kicked over a pew in the back of the church; the sound echoed like a gunshot against the walls. It was so frustrating! To see where Sayaka was - where she would end up - and feel anything other than contempt for the girl should have been impossible. But contempt was far from her mind. No - instead she could only describe what she felt as...as love. She had been drawn to Sayaka initially in order to break the girl down. _Someone_ had to teach that stubborn knight just how far kindness and justice would get her. Somewhere in the middle, however, between their various clashes and the stupid, crazy, _kind_ act of wasting a grief seed on a girl who saw her as an enemy, Kyouko found herself in love. It dawned on her like any other random thought, without flash or fanfare. _Get food, hunt a witch, tell Sayaka you love her_ \- this thought slipped itself into the daily to-do list one morning and never left.

Only, the act of telling Sayaka the way she felt was as risky, as dangerous, as fighting a witch. What if she rebuffed the advance? What if she took it as a surrender of all of Kyouko's values and cynicism? The redhead could not accept this, not on her life.

All of this brought her to a realm of safety and comfort, one bathed in the flames of tragedy. This old church was reminder and refuge, bad dream and bastion. She thought that it was the only place in the world to sit, think, and relax.

"How do I tell that stupid girl anything without her challenging me?" She said to herself between bites. She thought best as she ate. "She's just as stubborn as Homura - and worse, she's louder!"

Somewhere between her fifth and sixth stick of pocky Kyouko fell asleep on a pew. Her sleep was dreamless and silent. The morning's cool breeze caressed her awake. She yawned, stretched, and left the church without a destination in mind - be it a place of salvation or sadness she never liked to stick around the church for long. She instead headed to an arcade. Nervous, frustrated energy flowed through her body and was evident even in the slight darkening of her soul gem. She needed to use that energy, and what better way to do that than also kicking the ass of the high score at a dance game?

Kyouko bounded from rooftop to rooftop on her way to the arcade when she was struck by that familiar sticky sense in her very soul signaling a witch. She stopped, tasting it in the air. The bright afternoon sun was directly overhead, and below her people went through their day without even once knowing of the danger they might be in.

_I guess taking that down'll use up some energy too._

She changed course and headed to the location of the witch. The city rushed below as she traveled its length. Sunlight glinted off of the glass of all of the buildings around her like a giant disco ball. She loved this feeling of near-flying; it was like nothing else.

She arrived at the witch's location, an abandoned building in the blurred line between her territory and Madoka's. Thus, it wasn't a surprise when the pink-haired magical girl also showed up at the location.

"Good morning, Kyouko." She greeted, smiling. In the sunlight the pale pink of her skirt glowed softly. Kyouko watched the wind gently play with her red hair ribbons.

"How're ya?"

If Kyouko found Homura and Sayaka to be the hardest of the Mitakihara girls to get along with, Madoka was at the other end of the spectrum. She never said a harsh word, never hurt anyone, and seemed to have the biggest heart among all of them. The girl seemed almost too pure to be a magical girl in the first place, or maybe she seemed like what the ideal magical girl should be. Kyouko wasn't sure which thought was more correct.

"I'm fine. And you?"

"I'll feel good once I crush this thing." Kyouko cracked her neck.

"Ah, well, if you'd like to do it yourself, I won't get in your - "

"How about this - you can help me if I can talk to you about...somethin'."

Embarrassing as it was to ask, if there was anyone who would help her with Sayaka it was Madoka - the blue haired girl's closest friend.

"You _want_ my help? N-not that I won't help you!"

"Don't make me say it again, it's uncool." Kyouko blushed slightly, looking away.

"Well then sure, I'll help you." She smiled wide - a sunny day smile that only a girl could have. Kyouko wondered for a moment why Madoka's idealism and optimism didn't get under her skin the way Sayaka's did. Maybe it was simply Madoka's attitude. She wasn't stubborn in the slightest, and didn't try to push all her values onto others the way that Sayaka did.

Together the girls entered the witch's barrier. As always, Kyouko felt a strange lightness, a strange weightlessness upon entering. Before her body could adapt to the witch's barrier there was an effect like she was a layer above it, or a layer below all of reality. The shock of being inside the barrier never ceased to be an unpleasant one.

Small familiars bounded at the girls the moment they entered; the creatures were dealt with quickly. The girls traveled further into the labyrinth, the environment of which was an odd purple and black studded with paper-craft eyeballs that followed them as they walked. The sound of their footsteps was dispersed by the odd, immaterial ground.

"So, uh, Madoka...are you and Akemi, you know, a thing?" Kyouko asked. While she didn't really like to pry in other people's business, she didn't know exactly how to breach her own relationship issues, or rather the lack thereof.

"Me and Homura?" a blush crossed her face above something of a shy smile, but she looked at Kyouko confidently anyway. "Yes. I think we are." she giggled. "I know she cares about me very much, and I think the way I feel about her would be called 'love' too."

"Then," Kyouko gulped. This was harder than she expected. "Then can you help me to deal with that stubborn - with Sayaka? How do I talk to her?"

"Sayaka? I guess you could be nicer to her - you _have_ tried to fight her a lot, if I may. But then, she does the same to you..." Madoka took another moment to gather her thoughts. "Well, what is it that you wanted to talk to her about specifically?"

Kyouko's face grew red. "N-nothing in particular. I just, uh, want to get along with her better than I do now."

"Hmmm..." Madoka paused. Although she didn't say anything, the small smile on her lips said that she understood _exactly_ where Kyouko was coming from. "Why don't you try to keep calm most of all? You two get at each other's throats easily, so you have to make sure you're watching yourself. Then you can tell her how you feel." She giggled without malice, an innocent giggle. "That 'calm' part is very important."

"Calm, eh?" Kyouko put her arms behind her head, still blushing. "I can try to do calm. It's just that she's so...delusion. She's so stubborn!"

"I think she might say the same about you." Madoka laughed.

The girls reached the chamber of the witch without a problem. Its presence - that cold, slimy feeling - intensified as they stood outside the seal. Kyouko shuttered involuntarily.

"Be careful in there, Kyouko."

"Hmph. Somethin' like this isn't gonna take me down." she smiled confidently.

Together they entered the witch's chamber, and immediately dodged to either side of a large fist, the owner of which glared down from three directions. Its triple-sided faces, atop a skeletal frame, angrily followed the girls wherever they ran. It yelled unintelligibly in a banshee shriek.

The witch's chamber looked like the dream of a murderous stuffed animal. The floor was plushy and white, like fluffy cotton, and from this sprouted large silver sowing needles. However, interspersed throughout the room were large fleshy columns leaking pink blood. For any normal person the room might lead to instant insanity. For magical girl veterans, it lead only to a disturbing sense of unease.

While pink energy arrows flew towards the beast from behind a fleshy column, Kyouko readied her spear, stabbing once and once more to impale the large witch wherever her spear could reach. Again it screamed - again it thrashed towards the girls. Madoka ducked beneath the swing of an arm, while Kyouko rolled to the side, extended her spear out as far as her arm could reach, and used that motion to slice the witch's frontward face. After magical arrows pierced the other two faces the redhead took its momentarily blindness as an opening and thrust her whole body, spear first, into the beast, landing a final, finishing puncture wound. With a scream the witch dissolved into nothing much at all. The grief seed left behind fell to the ground, it's tiny clinking absorbed just like the sound of the girls' footsteps.

Like the witch who created it, the labyrinth dissolved around Kyouko and Madoka and disappeared. Again came the feeling of being disengaged from the very reality around them. It lasted only a half a second, but felt like half a year.

"Good job!" Madoka said once they finally felt settled.

"Here." Kyouko walked to the grief seed, picked it up, and tossed it behind her towards Madoka. She looked at the redhead in surprise, but couldn't utter a word before Kyouko started to walk away.

"Thanks for the advice. I'll think it over."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three more chapters to go!
> 
> Thanks for reading.
> 
> Reviews, criticisms, and responses are all welcome.


	3. Chapter 3 (Sayaka)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sayaka comes to a decision.

Sayaka was surrounded by heads. All around her all she saw were the alert and listening heads of her fellow classmates as their teacher taught English. Try as she might, however, she couldn't focus on the lesson. All she could think of was red hair, was a fang, was a spear. Kyouko left no space in her mind for the occupation of _actual_ important information (like the lesson she was currently missing). There was only Kyouko, standing confident in her red battle dress with the grin of a hunter and the eyes of a snake and -

_Snap!_

Sayaka heard the sound of the pencil before she felt the splinters stabbing her palm. The pain was nothing like what a witch would cause, but it was irritating nonetheless. A few of those studious heads turned towards her and she offered only a bashful, apologetic smile in response.

To show up at her home for no reason - what was Kyouko thinking? Sayaka just couldn't understand. One day Kyouko was a violent foe, territorial like a bear. The next she was amiable, friendly, and constantly eating (then again, she never stopped eating regardless of her mood). She could even be somberly serious, to a confusing degree. This spectrum, this confusion of mood and emotion simply didn't work with Sayaka, who wanted things black or white - good or bad - friend or foe. But the heart wants what the heart wants. For all of her grumbling, it wasn't the fact that Kyouko was on her mind all the time that was the issue; it was the fact that Sakura Kyouko would not act in accordance to Sayaka's world view, leading the blue haired girl to agonize over just how she might show the other girl the error of her ways, to bring her from that middle ground of friend or foe into someone squarely on the "friend" side, if not something more.

All of this, this churning sea of thought and emotion, attributed to Sayaka's failure to pay any attention to her teacher at all, and the destruction of the only pencil she had with her that day. In vain she looked towards where Madoka sat - but the girl, uncharacteristically, was out of class. That only left one person: Homura Akemi - a girl somehow more annoying than Kyouko, if only because she acted like she knew everything that was going to happen. A girl who lived disengaged and unflappable in any and all non-Madoka respects. But she always _did_ seem prepared.

Sayaka sent the black-haired transfer student a text. "Can I borrow a pencil?"

Her phone buzzed a second later. "Check beneath your seat."

Almost as though Homura was ready before she even received the text, a pencil rolled its way beneath a few students' desks towards her. She sent a thank you text. There was no response.

Even as school ended Sayaka could not remove the thought of that redhead from her mind, nor the uncharacteristic quiet she fell into before wordlessly leaving Sayaka's home the night before. Why couldn't Kyouko simply say what was on her mind instead of constantly getting angry and violent? Instead of closing up? Instead of lashing out?

All of this frustrated Sayaka to no end - in fact, she could even see the taint of her emotions on the glowing blue of her soul gem as an insidious smog floating through the bauble. School ended with Sayaka having learned nothing from class and nothing from the unending cycle of Kyouko-centered thoughts. What was there to learn? No, she had to _teach_. If Kyouko wouldn't share, wouldn't change, then she'd _teach_ the girl the value of justice and selflessness and love. Especially that last one.

Back at her home Sayaka was surprised to see that the redhead hadn't made her way in like a burglar and stolen her food, or messed up her perfectly made bed. Nothing in the room had been moved from the night before, it seemed. The girl almost laughed to herself - last night she couldn't have wanted to kick the girl out any more than she did, and now she was bothered by Kyouko's absence! It was almost funny.

_I suppose I shouldn't complain. Maybe now I have time to go out with Mami or Madoka or something._

The sun had yet to set behind the city's tall buildings and it cast an orange glow through the alleys and walkways of Mitakihara. Seeing that it wasn't all that late, Sayaka called Mami to check if the girl was free. Maybe she could get her mind off of that infuriating redhead for some time if she spent the evening with kinder friends.

"Hey, Mami, are you around today?"

"I'm just getting home, actually. Would you like to come over for some tea?"

"Sure, sounds good."

"I'll call Madoka, then. See you in a bit!"

On the way to Mami's apartment, Sayaka met up with Madoka. She first spotted the ribbons as they moved in the breeze, and she ran to catch up to the smaller girl.

"Hey Madoka!"

"Ah, Sayaka! You scared me!" she giggled.

"Why weren't you in class today? I meant to text you, but, well, I've been distracted lately."

"On my way to school a witch appeared. Kyouko and I - "

"K-Kyouko!?" _And here I was, trying to get her name out of my head!_

Madoka smiled bashfully. "The witch was between our territories, so..."

"W-well, that's fine. At least I know she's not dead or something."

"Did you expect her to be?"

Sayaka didn't answer; the girls had reached the front door of Mami's apartment and so the blue haired girl knocked instead. Mami lived alone in the small, but comfortable place. Her parents had died not long before and with what money was left to her she moved into a home all by herself. She kept the place clean, homey, and well furnished, although Sayaka never could wipe away the odd sense of loneliness radiating from the walls and from the home's sole resident. Sayaka and Madoka (and even on very rare occasions Kyouko and Homura) enjoyed spending time here once or twice a week for tea and snacks, provided happily and free of charge by Mami. The older girl's amber eyes, normally hiding a painful loneliness, shined like jewels on these days.

On this afternoon the only visitors were Sayaka and Madoka. The three girls sat around Mami's stylish glass coffee table, which was shaped like a triangle. They passed cakes and cookies around the table and made meaningless small talk. From this Mami brought up a more pressing topic.

"It seems like every day there are stronger witches appearing. I hope you girls are being careful when you hunt them."

"I noticed that too, Mami. I wonder why that is." Madoka responded.

"All this means is that we have an even bigger responsibility to take them down and save people!" Sayaka said between bites of a decadent chocolate cake.

"Exactly." Mami giggled. "I wonder if maybe Kyubey might know what this all means."

Sayaka shook her head. Her life now revolved around witches, around magical girl responsibilities. She wanted to talk about something else.

"So, how's Akemi?" she asked Madoka after remembering Homura's small act of kindness earlier in the day. A pink not unlike her hair spread across Madoka's face.

"Homura's fine." she paused a moment before letting out something between a sigh and a nervous giggle. "Even with me she's sometimes so distant! But I'm sure she'll open up one day."

"And how's Kyouko, Sayaka?" Mami asked, a smile playing at her lips.

"H-how should I know!? That girl's impossible, that's what."

The other two girls could only laugh as their friend crossed her arms.

Sayaka had not had that kind of fun in some time. For weeks she'd been overly concerned with Kyouko, with witches, with her own feelings. To sit back and laugh with not only an old friend, but with a girl she looked up to, calmed Sayaka's troubled heart and mind.

She returned home that night and tried to study. She truly did. With her books before her, without a single physical distraction, she attempted to learn what she missed in class that day - to absolutely no avail. This was even worse than when she had that small, childish crush on Kyousuke. Sure, she thought about him a few times a day when it was he whom she longed for, but the way Kyouko had hijacked her heart, her mind - it was almost criminal. She took a deep breath and closed her books. If what Kyouko had done to her emotions was criminal, well, she had no choice but to hunt her down and take her in. Show her that she couldn't go around and do what she wanted - not to people's hearts - just as she couldn't simply sit and wait for unfortunate victims to feed witches. No, Sayaka would not allow it. She needed to confront Kyouko.

The wind pushing back her bright blue hair, the strength coursing through her body, the piston-pumping of her legs - Sayaka felt none of this as she bounded from building to building in search of Sakura Kyouko. What she did feel came from her heart and her heart alone. Heat warmed her chest; some mixture of anger, some of desire, filled her as she scoured the city for the redhead, calling out "Kyouko!" mentally like a non-verbal bullhorn. Sayaka needed to settle this and could think of nothing else until it was done, just as she could think of nothing else until her decision to be (or not to be) a magical girl had been made.

This single-minded search was all she could think about until she received a text from Homura. The night air was chilly, yes, but it had nothing to do with the icy despair that momentarily gripped her heart.

"Mitakihara is going to be destroyed."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> Reviews, criticisms, and responses are all welcome.


	4. Chapter 4 (Kyouko)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls learn some heavy news, and Kyouko has to finally do what she'd been dreading.

Three of the five Mitakihara girls were already seated on Homura's oddly circular couch when Kyouko arrived following a severe and matter-of-fact text by the stoic girl. The atmosphere in the room shivered with cold anxiety; Mami drummed her fingers, lost in thought, while Madoka attempted to make small talk. She hung onto Homura's arm for comfort, but Homura's eyes looked glazed over as though she gazed out at a different world. And yet, wherever Homura's mind might be, Kyouko could still see the way she gripped Madoka's knee as evidence of a painful need - of her existence there and then.

Kyouko took a seat opposite Mami. She put her arms behind her head, and her red ponytail hung off the back of the couch as she reclined. "Whatever this "threat" is," she said, "I'm sure it'll be nothin' we can't handle."

"So, Kyouko, have you figured out how to deal with your...'problem'?" Madoka asked. She was visibly nervous, slightly shaking. Had Homura already told her what was coming? Was she trying to distract herself from an awful truth?

"I'm just gonna take your advice next time I see - "

Sayaka walked in right then like the punchline to some cosmic joke. She looked around the room, her eyes lingering on Kyouko for a few seconds too long, before she made it to Homura.

"Hello, everyone." she greeted dryly. "Now, what's this about, Akemi? The 'destruction of Mitakihara' thing."

Sayaka took a seat on the couch beside Mami and crossed her knees. Kyouko tried her hardest not to look at the girl.

"There is a large witch headed for our town in just over a week." Homura began. She stood up and walked towards a large white wall with odd decorative paintings from different time periods. From a device on the ceiling came a computer projection showing the path of a typhoon off the coast of Japan.

"So?" Kyouko interrupted "It's not like we haven't fought big witches before."

The only thing confusing the redhead was the seemingly out -of-place weather report. What did it mean?

Mami chimed in as well, more curious and less confrontational than Kyouko. "What is it that makes this one so dangerous?"

"This is no simple witch. It's an existence called 'Walpurgisnacht' - a witch stronger than anything we've ever faced, almost like a collection of witches. It is so powerful it is appearing to regular humans as this incoming typhoon."

Kyouko followed Homura's finger trace the computer projection of the storm. It appeared out at seat without warning and, as if it had an agenda, as if it could think, the storm traveled straight towards their city.

"That's - that's crazy! How do we know you're right, Akemi?" Sayaka leaned forward in her seat with a critical look in her eyes. Kyouko couldn't blame the girl. This whole thing _did_ sound unbelievable. A witch powerful enough to be a force of nature? There was no way it could be real.

"I've...spoken to other magical girls who have fought something similar." Homura did not blink as she answered.

"And I can confirm her theory." Came a young, child-like voice. Only, the voice never reached the ears of the girls. It was projected mentally, and felt as invasive as the method implied. Kyubey, with its tail slowly tick-toking, appeared out of thin air (as it was wont to do). The creature hopped up on top of the couch and looked at each of the magical girls with its unblinking eyes and its never-ending smile.

"That's nuts." Kyouko said, whistling low in near-appreciation. She reached into her pocket for a snack. If even the little fairy-thing was backing her up, maybe Homura was onto something.

"If it's like a storm...does that mean it's going to hurt people? Non-magical girls?" Mami asked.

"It's inevitable." came Homura's emotionless response.

"So what do we do? I can only imagine that a joint mission is the answer." Mami offered. "We need to make sure as few people get hurt as possible. Especially those who can't defend themselves the way we can."

Kyouko smirked and looked over to the older girl. "There's nothin' to be scared of, is there? I'm sure we got this in the bag, so -"

"Are you about to argue over who gets the grief seed?" Sayaka interrupted, her cute face beset with dagger eyes.

Kyouko felt annoyance of her own bubbling up in her chest. Cute though she may have been, who was Sayaka to call her out like that?

...Not that she was wrong in her accusation.

"Shows what you know. But if it's a fight you want - "

"It's not." Sayaka said, suddenly serious. There was still a hard look in her eyes and Kyouko didn't know what the girl meant. She did know that she wasn't being kind, like she promised Madoka, and an unusual sense of shame filled the space formerly occupied by annoyance.

"You said we had a week, right Homura?" Mami asked. "So that gives us all a week to prepare; I think we'll need all the time we can get. I'm sure that, together, we can take this witch down without major losses."

After Mami's words Homura turned to Madoka. Like she had something to say, like she had a whole _lifetime_ of words, Homura gazed with a longing Kyouko couldn't handle; she turned instead to stare at the blank ceiling.

"Hopefully." Homura finally answered. Her voice was like church bells at a funeral.

The meeting ended with little else said. Mami excused herself and left first, followed shortly by Madoka who, with a longing nearly equal to what Homura had shown, looked back at the slumped form of Homura Akemi sitting silent, pondering something unknowable on the couch. She left without a word. Sayaka left next, and Kyouko did the same a few minutes later, thinking that she would be alone.

This was not the case.

As Kyouko stepped out into the cold night (where overhead a sickly yellow sickle moon shined) she was almost immediately called into the shadow of an alley between two buildings, dark and silent.

"Kyouko, I need you to be honest with me." Sayaka said. She stood, arms crossed, against the cold wall of a tall brick apartment building. The redhead needed to calm her nerves, and took a pocky stick out to do so.

"Want one?" she offered. The girl shook her head in response. "Suit yourself. So, what's up?"

"Can you _please,_ " the word was accentuated, amplified. " _Please_ tell me what in the _world_ your problem is?"

"Wha - ? What's that supposed to mean?! If anyone has a problem it's a stuck up kid like you."

"What that's supposed to mean," Sayaka glided over the insult. "Is that you are a _child_ , Kyouko! You fought me over territory when we first met, you've returned time and time again to my house like a lost puppy, and now you just stopped out of nowhere. It's infuriating!"

Kyouko felt fire in her chest licking painfully at her ribcage, its smoke attempting to escape the chimney of her throat - to poison the air with smog as it billowed out of her mouth. She clenched her firsts at her side instead, and bit into another pocky stick. Her words came out forced as she spoke slowly and carefully. "There _is_ no problem. I, uh, see myself...in you, I guess. That selflessness in you - I wanna show you that it's doomed to fail. So that you're ready when it _does_." Kyouko avoided the other's eyes. It was only a half truth.

"That doesn't answer my question, Kyouko." Now Sayaka took a step forward. A blink, and she was in her magical girl uniform, its white cape fluttering in the wind. "But you certainly know how to get on my nerves."

Kyouko followed suit, closing the gap in one step and donning her own dress. If this was how Sayaka wanted to explain her feelings it was all the better to the redhead - nothing said just what one feels, in the fewest words possible, like a fight. But Madoka's advice once again filled her head. _"Why don't you try to keep calm most of all? You two get at each other's throats easily, so you have to make sure you're watching yourself. Then you can tell her how you feel."_

Fighting was how the two of them normally acted, and where had that gotten them so far?

Kyouko changed back and made some space between the two of them, though she struggled to do so. Rage still filled her body, and fire still burned in her chest. Sayaka looked confused. "What, backing down? Now I have _no_ idea who you are. What are you up to?"

"Now? Or over the past few weeks?"

"Now! I mean...both. What are you _up to_? You're all I can think about nowadays." Sayaka admitted. Though her words invited a slight blush to grace her features, her eyes still looked at Kyouko with doubt and irritation.

_"You're all I can think about nowadays" -_ ah, that sounded wonderful to Kyouko. She'd made an impact, it meant.

"I...I..." she was going to do it! She was going to say what she truly felt. Kyouko's mouth became a desert. Sayaka looked at her critically, but mostly patiently, and awaited the response. With that cute face, with that cute hair...Oh, Kyouko's tongue was lead in her mouth!

"You what?"

"Ugh! This is impossible! Look, Sayaka - I am who I am, and I'm interested in you -"

"I-interested?" the red hue on Sayaka's cheeks deepened, though from anger or embarrassment Kyouko couldn't tell. Her heart beat like a drum. This whole thing was more stressful than fighting witches, and maybe just as dangerous.

"D-don't take that to mean anything special!" What was she saying? That's _exactly_ what it meant! "I, uh, like...like..."

"Kyouko, even _Hitomi_ could say to me what she wanted to, and I'm sure that telling me she was going to make a move on Kyousuke was more upsetting than whatever it is you're about to say. Out with it already."

The power to tell Sayaka what she felt seemed to vanish into thin air. No, this wasn't how she wanted to do it, stammering like a child. _Nervous._ Her, Kyouko, was nervous! She might have fought back anger, but anxiety (what a foreign word to the redhead!) was a different beast. It was one she couldn't yet defeat.

She made a tactical retreat instead.

"Never mind. Don't get yourself killed before that Walpurgis-whatever shows up, alright?"

"Hey, Kyouko! Get back here! You can't just say something like that and run!"

Kyouko, however, was already gone, having disappeared into the dark of the night in one quick leap. Cool air soothed her blushing cheeks, but did little to calm her heart. Oh, what Sayaka said was correct! She _was_ a child. Violence was easy; kids hit each other on the playground all the time. It was all this emotion - these feelings and fears - that were difficult. Love, hate, terror, desire, worry for others - these were things that lead to her wish in the first place. She loved her family. She wanted her father to be happy and successful, to preach his word to a ministry that would love him. And if it got the family out of poverty, out of hunger and pain and sadness, then the wish would have to be worth it. But where did that leave everyone in the end? Gone. Dead. Maybe if she never opened up to Sayaka she could keep them both safe from that kind of tragedy.

Sakura Kyouko spent what might be her final week alive avoiding the one person she wanted to avoid the least. That it might be her last week was something the girl attempted to forget. Yet she still felt the waves of anxiety, restlessness, and fear in her very soul that Walpurgisnacht instilled on its way to the city. What might have sounded almost like a joke at first - _what kind of witch could be a typhoon?_ \- grew more and more real as the week trudged on. Kyouko didn't feel that odd slimy chill up her spine like with _normal_ witches; instead she slowly noticed a general sense of foreboding, irritation, and unease increasing day by day.

Those daily visits to her family's dilapidated church instead lasted minutes now, rather than hours. The crumbling walls and dusty pews hurt to look at more than usual, and in her frustration Kyouko unwittingly destroyed at least part of the old, beautiful roof.

When she could no longer stand the church Kyouko went to her favorite arcade to dance, to mindlessly expend energy. She showed up one morning to play on her favorite machine. There was no line, thankfully, and she started the game up with a few coins. As she scrolled through the song list an emptiness began to grow in her heart - these songs meant nothing to her. The dance was nothing but some memorized steps and, with just how etched they were in her muscle memory, her mind was open to all of its wanderings, all of its wanton fantasies about her family - about the upcoming battle - about her rocky relationship with Sayaka.

What a sham it all was! The arcade no longer afforded her thoughtless entertainment; now, its closed in walls, its blinking, blaring lights, its smell, the uselessness of it all only made her sick. Kyouko couldn't even visit after the first time she tried that week.

Worst still, she could not even hunt witches. Kyouko scoured the city to the extent that she intruded into the territory of the other girls, and yet not a single witch appeared all week. It was incredible. Not one witch! Was Homura right, then? Was this Walpurgis-thing just a great collection of witches, and did it pull in any who tried to form within the city limits?

_This might be more dangerous than I thought,_ she realized on her fourth night out on an unsuccessful hunt.

But at least it meant that Sayaka was safe. She wasn't going to foolishly die during the week. Or, at least, it wouldn't be so easy.

As the week drew to a close Kyouko was no longer sure whether those awful feelings in her heart were a product of that incoming witch, or from her cowardly escape from Sayaka. If the girl was hard to clear from her mind before all of this, it was impossible now. The only thing she could think about was that cute, idealistic, blue-haired enemy of hers. There was nothing else anymore. Maybe...maybe she should just go with it - let that naive girl learn her lesson about selflessness and justice by herself and more importantly, she, Kyouko, could be there as a shoulder to cry on. The plan certainly had its allure.

But that would require giving up some pride and confessing to Sayaka. Could it be done? Was it worth it if by the end of the week Walpurgisnacht might kill them all?

Flashing through Kyouko's mind was her father's happiness before he learned of her wish. His smile, his pride - despite how everything ended, Kyouko slowly realized that it was worth it just for that smile. The outcome, terrible though it was, could not erase the happy memories that came from the event. It could bury it, but still the memory would persist.

With the day before the proposed end nearly over, Kyouko found herself standing on the sill of Sayaka's open window with her fist posed motionlessly just beside the hard wood. She hesitated to knock on it and wake the sleeping girl.

_What am I so afraid of?_ She asked herself, and then knocked on the sill. The sound was louder than she expected and Sayaka bolted out of her sleep.

Not in her whole life had Kyouko ever seen such a look on someone's face. A mixture of anger, of tears, relief, indignation, joy - so many masks passed over Sayaka's face at once until they were all dropped away.

"Where have you been all week?" came a hoarse whisper.

"Never mind that. Sayaka, you idiot, I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> Reviews, criticisms, and responses are all welcome.


	5. Chapter 5 (Sayaka)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sayaka responds to Kyouko's declaration of love.

" _Sayaka, you idiot, I love you._ "

Sayaka's inner thoughts ended for a moment - the record skipped, the film reel stuttered, the signal was dropped. After everything Kyouko had put her through, how could she show up and drop a bomb like that?

"No. No, I'm not falling for that one Kyouko." She shook her head in disbelief. She went even as far as to begin closing her window.

"I'm not kidding, Sayaka!"

She stopped pushing the window downwards. "Prove it."

"Prove it? Just tell me what I've gotta do and I'll show ya this minute."

Kyouko accepted the challenge quicker than Sayaka imagined. Could she be genuine, then? Where else might that confidence come from?

"Fine then. Can...can you tell me _why_ you love me?"

"Uh," the girl's face grew nearly as red as her hair. "You're cute. And you can hold your own in a fight. And...and as much as your beliefs annoy me I just can't get you outta of my head. I've never met someone more infuriating." she chuckled at the end.

It was almost like Kyouko was reading her own thoughts; Sayaka couldn't deny the girl if their minds were acting so similar. It'd be total hypocrisy.

"Is that alright?" Kyouko asked, blush now a deeper scarlet. She was still seated on the windowsill and a soft breeze shifted her hair every few moments.

"Just...come on in Kyouko. You're going to catch a cold out there."

Sayaka took her hand and lead them into the dark of her room. The desk lamp was off and the moon was missing in the night sky, or hiding itself among the pinpoint stars. She couldn't make out the vibrancy radiating from Kyouko's hair, nor the single sharp tooth in its normal smirking position. She couldn't, really, make out anything about Kyouko at that moment, not after that confession. The girl blurred at the edges. But her hand was strong, was concrete and physical and firm. Sayaka noticed the strength in that hand well - how it gripped self-assured and confident and overwhelming. It offered Sayaka protection and warmth. It was not the dainty, technical hand of that violin player (who was now so far from her mind that even his name was missing from the plate outside his hospital room in the remnants of her memory) - Kyouko's was a powerful hand, but a giving one all the same.

The girls sat side by side once Sayaka lead them deep enough into her room. Sayaka hugged her knees to her chest and leaned slightly against Kyouko (to touch was enough - oh, how she craved even small physical contact like this!). Her partner sat with only one leg outstretched, while the other was bent up.

"Are you scared?" Sayaka asked in a whisper so as not to break the atmosphere, not to shatter its glass fragility and ruin the moment. She might never have another like this.

"'Bout tomorrow? Well, a bit." Kyouko shrugged, and Sayaka felt her body's movements beneath the covering of the night. The shifting of her body and her clothing rubbed up against the blue haired girl, who reveled in the feeling.

"Me too. I didn't believe Akemi at first, but you can feel that _thing_ in the air."

"And here I thought a naive idiot like you couldn't get scared over anything." The words were vitriolic, but Kyouko's soft chuckle took away the sting.

"We might actually die tomorrow, you know."

"No need to worry about that." Kyouko shrugged again.

"I'm sorry? _Death_ isn't the general norm for high school girls."

"You're a magical girl, Sayaka. Death comes with the contract."

"Wow," she sarcastically whistled, "I'm almost amazed that you could think that deeply."

"I've been at this job longer than you, _blueberry_."

B-blueberry? Sayaka didn't know if she should be offended at the title or excited that Kyouko was already giving her a nickname, even if she did say it sarcastically. She snuggled closer to the redhead. They were seated on the floor with their backs propped up against Sayaka's bed. Dressed in her pajamas (a simple, criss-cross patterned top and bottom) Sayaka was comfortable, but Kyouko shivered in her teal hoodie and short denim shorts. Sayaka grabbed the comforter from the bed above them and draped it over their bodies, warm and soft. The deep-blue comforter was new, as were the matching sheets; there was nothing she could do to clean the blood and rain-soaked bedding from weeks before, and so she'd concealed the incriminating threads in the trash as soon as Kyouko moved off of her bed on the day she stayed over. With nothing to do and without the will to grab Kyouko's hand again, Sayaka looked awkwardly at her own hands. She wanted Kyouko's love and attention, yes, but now that she had it she had no idea what to do with it. The whole time she'd known Sakura Kyouko the two had been held at one another's throat. But that was the past now: close by, nipping at their heels, but the past nonetheless.

Worse still, if there was no tomorrow, if there was nothing left after this fight with Walpurgisnacht, did this love mean anything at all? The poisonous thought entered Sayaka's head with a chilling importance.

"Hey, Kyouko?"

"Hmm?" the girl responded, though she neared sleep. They had been quiet for some time in the deep of the night.

"What if...what if the worst happens tomorrow? Is there anything that we can do to...prove this love?"

Kyouko chuckled and smirked. "On the first date?"

"... _Oh._ You idiot." Sayaka punched the girl softly in the arm. "That's not what I meant."

"You look cute, all worried like that."

"D-don't ignore the question!" Sayaka felt the blush glowing on her face.

"Well," Kyouko turned to Sayaka, and in the dark her red eyes glowed like embers. "I could kiss you."

Their faces, their bodies were already close. Sayaka could feel the heat shared between them now but didn't make a move. She wanted to - oh, how badly she wanted to! - and yet something held her back. The pause lasted only a few seconds, but between her worried eyes and fidgeting fingers Kyouko saw through the wait.

"Not ready yet? Or am I just not...you know... - "

"N-no, that's not it! I, uh, guess I always just pictured everything a bit more romantic. Though I should know by now that nothing I plan happens the way I want it to."

"Like with that violin kid?"

"Don't remind me."

"Anyway, I'd say this is pretty romantic, ya know?"

"Huh?"

Kyouko listed things off her fingers. "Well, we're alone. And it's dark. And we're sharing a blanket. Oh, and we'll probably bite it tomorrow. That's kinda romantic, ain't it?"

"Your sense of romance is nearly as bad as your sense of right and wrong." But Sayaka was smiling.

_If only we'd done this sooner!_ she thought.

Despite her protests Sayaka turned once more towards the other girl and took her face in her hands. It was warm - deliciously warm and smooth. Magic healing capabilities certainly kept one's skin in top shape. She leaned in slowly and kissed Kyouko, first nervously, and then powerfully, needfully on the lips. Never in her life had she felt the way the kiss made her feel: the elation in her mind, the heat beneath her skin, the tightening in her chest all arrived at a crescendo - into one overwhelming release. Somewhere below these powerful emotions she almost laughed when she noticed that Kyouko tasted like chocolate; _must be all the pocky_ , she thought. When she pulled away she felt her cheeks burning. In what little visibility there was she saw that Kyouko's cheeks matched her own.

"I'm surprised you didn't try to eat me." Sayaka joked in an attempt to clear the air. Her heart raced and she was still at a loss as to how to manage the confusion of feelings coursing through her veins.

"Speaking of _eating_ , maybe if we had more time I cou - "

"Say no more."

The shade of the night only grew deeper as time passed. Clouds, those oppressive bodies, moved in during the night and blocked out what little light faintly radiated from the stars. Beneath the blanket the girls went through periods of cautious activity. They kissed, they held hands, they tried to grasp at what might come the next day. Between these unsure gropes, between those futile kisses settled periods of silent inactivity. Kyouko would go quiet and thoughtfully chew on a snack. Sayaka grew anxious at times like this - Kyouko, silent? Thoughtful? It went against common sense. _Then again,_ she realized, _so does the rest of my life._

At some point during the night the girls fell asleep. Kyouko gave in first; she tilted slowly and then suddenly fell into Sayaka's lap. Her mouth hung open slightly as she slept. Sayaka smirked - the beast could be tamed. The memories of their fights - the sting of a spear glancing against her side, the copper taste of blood in her mouth - almost seemed like a dream (like a distant memory (like a different time)). How could a girl who tried to kill her, a girl she tried to kill, end up sleeping on her lap? And why did it feel like she belonged there more than anywhere else in the world? It was preposterous. It was unjust. It was almost infuriating.

It was love.

~!~

The morning arrived in muted light, dimmed further through Sayaka's blinds. She looked downwards if only to make sure that Kyouko was still there. And she was! Breathing deeply, breathing slowly, Kyouko's peaceful face lay softly still on her lap. Sayaka played with the girl's hair.

"Kyouko, wake up." she whispered.

She groaned in response.

"Come on. We have a city to save."

"...This lap matters to me more than any of those people out there. Let's just stay like this."

"That's a terribly selfish attitude," she paused. Kyouko didn't move. "But think of it this way. If we _don't_ try to help, we definitely _won't_ have another day together."

Kyouko pouted, but sat up. "Then I'm doing this for us."

_Us?!_ _To think there's already an us..._

Sayaka couldn't hide her blush as she stood up. She offered Kyouko a hand and pulled the other girl upwards as well. The two of them donned their uniforms and stood in the center of Sayaka's room. The blue haired girl watch Kyouko look around the room, taking in the sights.

"Woulda been nice to have spent more time in here - " Kyouko began

"K-Kyouko!"

"Not like that! I mean, ya know, with you. We wasted a lotta time, didn't we?"

Sayaka smiled sadly. "I'm glad we finally started, though."

Everyone met on the soggy banks of the waterfront near Mitakihara Middle School before noon. The day looked as bleak as the night before promised, overcast with a physical sense of dread in the way of increasing rain and the indescribable awfulness Walpurgisnacht's emotional miasma caused. The other three Mitakihara girls were already waiting when finally Sayaka and Kyouko arrived, the former concentrating and breathing deeply, the latter with her hands behind her head as though Death itself was only a passing friend and not a car careening towards them. Mami looked preoccupied. She was touching herself up, smoothing out her clothing, fixing and fixing her hair. She gave the girls a heartfelt "hello", however. She was never one to show her worries to her precious juniors.

"Are you girls ready?" she asked the incoming couple.

"As ready as I can be for something like this." Sayaka admitted. "I'm trying to stay confident, though!"

"And you, Kyouko?"

"I'm gonna do my best," she smirked. "Can't wait to give this thing a taste of what I can do."

The girls walked down parallel to the waterway, if only to waste time until the witch appeared. They passed the spot further down the bank where Homura and Madoka conversed in quiet intimacy. Madoka smiled - she always tried to smile, to stay hopeful - and she seemed to truly mean it when she told Homura that "things will be okay". She gripped Homura's hands in hers, but Homura looked as though she might vomit. The stoic girl's normal inner strength and determination appeared to have fled. Her eyes looked far, far beyond into the sky; was she looking at the incoming storm, or something else? And what was that look of resignation? The tiny smile she gifted to Madoka didn't reach her bag-rimmed eyes, and might have been a consolation gift rather than a reward for future victory. Sayaka had to look away. Homura gave her a more uncomfortable feeling than usual, an utterly dreadful feeling.

Kyouko stopped at the edge of the water and laid on her back, hands still behind her head.

"Not a care in the world, eh Kyouko? Shouldn't you be getting ready?"

"Walpurgis-whatever is coming to _us_. Not much to do but wait."

"You could at least _look_ worried."

"I guess you could say I'm trying to have faith in the ability for five girls to take down one witch."

"If we survive this, I'm going to whip you into shape. You're too lax to be a magical girl. We're saving lives, you know."

"We're saving our own lives. Every one of us is doing this for the grief seed."

"You can say that, but our work helps people regardless. We all wanted to change things for the better - I'm sure of that."

Kyouko opened an eye and gazed up at Sayaka. "Look, we might die. Why don't we just call it a moot point and enjoy these last few moments together?"

Sayaka opened her mouth once or twice, but grumbled and sat beside Kyouko. She hugged her knees to her chest. "Guess you're right." She paused. "I love you, Kyouko."

"Took you long enough to say it." But Kyouko smiled wide, genuinely, and responded in kind. "I love you too."

They did not have much time to relax; the sound of laughter emerged from the very sky itself like the call of an evil deity not long after this final declaration. There was a barely humanoid figure growing closer, faintly, and the storm grew far more violent with each passing second. Sayaka grasped for Kyouko's hand. There was strength in it, like always. She felt for a moment like their love was a flower that happened to bloom in the middle of a desert; futile but beautiful all the same.

~!~

Time stopped sometime during the fight. Not physically, not really, as far as Sayaka could tell, but in the sense that the end came. That there was no next time. That there was no 'tomorrow'.

In fact, there was no _anything_. The ruins of the city laid around them, destroyed as easily as a sandcastle is by a vicious child. Mami had been obliterated; there was simply nothing left of Sayaka's older-sister stand in. Madoka, pure Madoka, lay without breath or life on the desecrated earth; Sayaka saw her soul gem shatter during the battle and could do nothing to help now. Standing over the motionless body was the crying form of Homura Akemi - bleeding, battered, and broken. She sniffled once or twice more before turning the shield on her arm, and was gone. She simply vanished.

Sayaka paid no attention to any of this after the fact. All she could pay attention to was the unmoving, prone form of Sakura Kyouko lying face up five feet away. Sayaka attempted to crawl towards the girl; no such luck. She felt numb and cold, and although she could see her body she could not make it move. She couldn't feel a thing. Only through one of her eyes could she even see. The other was blinded with the sticky mixture of hair and blood.

Still, she tried to crawl forward. Kyouko was right there! Her soul gem shattered during the fight, but her body...her body was good enough for the end - and surely, this was the end for Sayaka as well. Her own soul gem was nearly black (and growing darker by the second) which she knew without even looking. Sayaka reached out her hand towards the girl. If only she could reach her! Using all that was left in her body, all of the energy left in her very soul, she slowly crawled forward. Blood, water, mud, dirt - she was covered as she made the short journey towards Kyouko. Everything burned now; she would have preferred the cold numbness she had just escaped from to the infernos blazing in her protesting body. But finally, _finally_ after her struggle Sayaka reached Kyouko's empty body. The girl looked pleasant in death somehow. Her red hair fell around her face like a veil, and there was a sense of calm that had never before graced Kyouko's features so deeply.

Sayaka laid her head on the girl's stomach and curled up into a ball as she waited for the end to come. What was Kyouko thinking, going on ahead of her? If there was anything after _this_ , after this horror, she would give Kyouko a piece of her mind. And then, of course, she'd give the girl whatever love she could muster from the depths of her soul. The thought made her smile.

_What an infuriating girl_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> Reviews, criticisms, and responses are all welcome.

**Author's Note:**

> There are four more chapters to this story, and I'll publish them once a week.
> 
> Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed it!
> 
> Reviews, criticisms, and responses are all welcome.


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